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A Christmas Tradition

We’re fast approaching Christmas, or more specifically, Ameli’s second Christmas.

As a couple, we have various traditions that we’ve developed over the years. I decorate the Christmas tree with bits we’ve collected from all over. We have been alone for six of the seven Christmases we’ve shared, so we always invite the strays – the people who would be alone too. It means we’ve ended up on our own sometimes, or with one or two friends other times, and it’s always been good.
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Welcome to the December Carnival of Natural Parenting: Let’s Talk Traditions

This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Code Name: Mama and Hobo Mama.

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I cook a full Christmas meal, whether for two or twenty, I lay the table, and use my great grandmother’s extra special dishes. I love making a ginger bread house, which I’ve only done twice, but intend to make a tradition – something my little girl and I can do together every Christmas eve.

Christmas eve we normally have friends around. We have a light meal. We play board games. We open a present each. Christmas morning, we open presents in our pajamas. We have a light breakfast and then I cook up a storm. Christmas afternoon we lie prone on our rounded bellies.

That’s how it’s been for six years.

Last year we had a two and a half month old. My sister and her boyfriend joined us and everything was pretty much as it had been the six years before, with the addition of family and our child.

This year is different though. This year we are in a different country. We have none of our comforts around us. We have no cookie cutters. We have no fancy dishes. We have little money. We have complicated family circumstances. I can’t cook a Christmas dinner in my home. This year our tradition is completely shot.

It’s almost strange to me, how much that has affected me, and it’s been interesting trying to arrange ‘around’ the lack of comfort zone.

But it’s made me remember another thing: My husband and I have spent Christmases on our own, we have spent it with very little, and with a lot. We have had great days and days with a tinge of sadness. But regardless of where, with what, or with who else, we’ve always had each other.

And despite the gingerbread house, the tree, the pajama-clad-gift-frenzy, the beautiful dishes, the perfectly brined turkey, and the flashing tree lights, being together is the only thing that matters. As the years pass we will build our own new traditions, and those will be the childhood moments that form Ameli’s memories and be some of the precious times that will bond our family.

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Visit Code Name: Mama and Hobo Mama to find out how you can participate in the next Carnival of Natural Parenting!

Please take time to read the submissions by the other carnival participants:

(This list will be live and updated by afternoon December 14 with all the carnival links.)

  • Traditions? What traditions? — Olivia at Write About Birth needs your advice: how can she make the most of the holiday season in a new country with only her immediate family? (@writeaboutbirth)
  • TRADITION!!!!!! — Ella at My Intentional Journey reminds us all to be thankful for family traditions; there are those who have none.
  • tradition! — Stefanie at Very, Very Fine came to realize that families can make incredible memories, even if they’re not wealthy (or organized).
  • Taking a child’s perspective on traditions — Lauren at Hobo Mama wants to keep in mind how important even the mundane traditions will be to her little ones. (@Hobo_Mama)
  • Sunday Dinners and Lullabies — Kat at Loving {Almost} Every Moment finds traditions in the small things throughout the year.
  • Simple Family Advent Traditions — Michelle at The Parent Vortex crafted a set of advent bags with daily surprises to eat and to do. (@TheParentVortex)
  • Parenting: Family Meetings – A Timeless Tradition — Amy Phoenix at Innate Wholeness discusses a year-round tradition in her household: Family Meetings. (@InnateWholeness)
  • Our Mindful Holidays — They may not be “traditional” traditions, but they fit the family of Kellie at Our Mindful Life.
  • Our Holiday Tradtions, New and Old — Even with three young children, Kristin at Intrepid Murmurings is finding ways to be intentional and meaningful about holiday traditions. (@sunfrog)
  • Our Cupcake Custom — Amy at Anktangle knows celebrations need minimal excuse and lots of cupcakes! (@anktangle)
  • On the bunny slope of tradition-making — Jessica Claire at Crunchy-Chewy Mama is finding her groove as a holistic-minded mama with a joyful holiday spirit. (@crunchychewy)
  • No, Virginia, There Is Not a Santa Claus — Just because her family is not going to do Santa, does not mean that Sheila at A Gift Universe can’t instill some mystery and magic into Christmas. (@agiftuniverse)
  • New Traditions — Becky at Future Legacy shares a few traditions she is starting for her family, including popovers, a birthday banner, and service.
  • My Holiday Family Traditions — The Artsymama continues a long tradition of adopting family members and sharing two favorite games that work well for a crowd.
  • Mindfully Creating Family Traditions — Alison at BluebirdMama has ideas for celebrating birthdays, Valentine’s Day, and Christmas — though her family’s still figuring some of it out. (@bluebirdmama)
  • Memorable Traditions — Lori Ann at MamaWit follows four mindful steps when instituting any tradition.
  • Let’s Talk Traditions — Lily, aka Witch Mom shares her family’s traditions that are centered on the wheel of the year. (@lilyshahar)
  • Homeschool Christmas — Deb Chitwood at Living Montessori Now did not always celebrate the Christmas season in the same way with her family, but they always celebrated together. (@DebChitwood)
  • Holidays, food and family — For Kristen at Adventures in Mommyhood, the holidays are about family and food. (@crunchymamato2)
  • Giving Christmas to the Critter — Rachael at The Variegated Life has found a way to tie her Zen practices to the Christmas story of the baby in the manger. (@RachaelNevins)
  • Family Traditions + To Santa Or Not To Santa — Stop by Natural Parents Network to discover some of the traditions from other natural parents. NPN is also featuring snippets of posts from NP bloggers on the topic of whether to encourage children to believe in Santa Claus. (@NatParNet)
  • Family Tradition Origins — Momma Jorje discusses her family’s traditions, and her desire not to make anyone feel obligated to conform to them.
  • Everyday Traditions — For Mandy at Living Peacefully with Children it’s the small, daily traditions that make life special.
  • Establishing Traditions and Older Child Adoption — MrsH at Fleeting Moments is trying to find ways to start traditions with a family that was made very quickly through birth and adoption.
  • Emerging Family Traditions — Melodie at Breastfeeding Moms Unite! shares some of her favorite birthday and Christmas traditions. (@bfmom)
  • Does Rebellion Count? — Seonaid at the Practical Dilettante has instituted a day of rest and PJs at her house on Christmas. (@seonaid_lee)
  • December Carnival of Natural Parenting: Family Traditions — Sybil at Musings of a Milk Maker tries to give her girls a mix of traditions to foster togetherness — but worries that not being near extended family is a disconnect.
  • Craft-tea Christmas Celebrations — Lucy at Dreaming Aloud created a delicious Christmas tradition that she named “Craft-tea.”
  • A Christmas Tradition — Luschka at Diary of a First Child knows that even though she won’t be able to have her usual holiday traditions this year, the important thing is that she has her family. (@lvano)
  • Celebrations without the Holiday — Asha at Meta Mom shares several ways to celebrate the winter holidays without focusing on religious traditions. (@metamomma)
  • Celebrating the Journey We Have Traveled Together — Acacia at Be Present enjoys the chance to draw closer to her family during the Christmas holiday.
  • Celebrating Motherhood — Do you celebrate the day you became a mother? Dionna at Code Name: Mama offers some ideas for traditions to mark your passage into motherhood. (@CodeNameMama)
  • Celebrate! Winter Traditions Brought Home. — At True Confessions of a Real Mommy, TrueRealMommy and her family are celebrating many different religions and traditions this month. Stop by to see their schedule of events. (@TrueRealMommy)
  • “Always Ready”, Holiday Style — Amy at Toddler In Tow discovered that it’s not the traditions themselves, but the emotional experience behind them that makes them special.

Luschka:
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