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I read a really powerful and moving guestpost this week over at Mama Eve. Anastacia talks about her c-sections and how she spent a long time mourning and angry after the first, and found healing in the second.

Although I wanted a VBAC, it meant more to me that this pregnancy be about healing and closure and I set out to do just that.

In the end, Anastacia never had her VBAC, but rather a repeat section, but she learned not to regret her birth experiences.

I’ve learned that my daughters’ births should not define me; it’s me who was meant to define their births.

And then she takes her experiences and turns them into positive affirmations of herself and her womanhood: I will never again regret how my daughters’ entered this world. My scar will never again be the symbol of my failure as a woman nor the token of my cheated passage into Motherhood, but rather it will shine as the physical personification of how deep a love I possess to endure all for my little angels.

I was really moved by her story, especially since so many women feel that they have failed, when the truth is that it is more often the system that fails the woman.

 

Categories: Friday Features

3 Comments

Friday Favourites – Healing And Happiness After A C-Section

  1. Ugh, late late late. I’m SO sorry. I promise it wasn’t on purpose. *cries*

    Your featured post was moving and touching and brought tears to my eyes. What powerful, powerful words: “I will never again regret how my daughters’ entered this world. My scar will never again be the symbol of my failure as a woman nor the token of my cheated passage into Motherhood, but rather it will shine as the physical personification of how deep a love I possess to endure all for my little angels.”

  2. I have felt like such a failure as a woman as well because I had to have a c-section. Every time a friend or a relative gets to have their baby naturally I always feel like I missed out. However it really is silly for me to act like this especially because I didn’t (and won’t ever) have a choice in the matter. If I want to have my own children, they have to come out via c-section. I won’t go into specifics but I’m definitely glad that I wasn’t one of those women way back when having children because I would’ve died in childbirth. I am thankful that we have these options now and I am thankful that I chose to do the best thing for myself and my baby when it came to her birth. I have decided to stop beating myself up over it just because I read too many natural parenting blogs that (I feel) condemn un-natural birthing. I wish that there was more support out there for women who have c-sections because sometimes it really isn’t easy to deal with it. But making a family is messy and everyone does it different.

    Thanks for this post btw.
    🙂

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