I remember when I was pregnant with your sister, there were weeks where it felt like I was in limbo, like nothing was happening. With her, week five wasn’t it. I’d been throwing up for days. With you, however, I get the occasional wave of nausea, and there are foods the thought of which turn my stomach, but so far, my appetite remains healthy, if a little reduced, and importantly everything stays down.
These early days are really difficult because there’s no evidence of you, I
know you’re there, but I’ve not seen you. Heck, by the time I was five weeks with Ameli, I’d had two scans â€“ this time, I’ve not even seen a midwife or a GP. I’m still waiting for them to phone me back for an appointment. Apparently they’re not as worried about the mum-to-be second time round, as we already know what’s going on. Fair enough, I guess.
So, really, there’s not a whole lot to tell you. You’re tiny right now â€“ your heart, which should start beating this week, is the size of a poppy seed, and you look a little like a tadpole. Your major organs are starting to develop, and I’m just praying that everything goes in the right place, and forms properly. How I feel about you doesn’t change, you’ll always be my baby, but it would make for an easier life if you’re healthy.
I’m looking pretty normal, although less of my hair is falling out, which is a bonus, as I was starting to worry that I was going bald. I’m thrilled to not be having periods again â€“ I’ve only had five in over two years now â€“ bliss. I’ll start taking photos of my belly soon enough, but at the moment, my normal belly fat is just protruding a little more. I’m definitely already showing more than I did last time though.
I’ve had to resist the urge to go out to the storage and bring in the big box of new born clothes. Fortunately we didn’t know Ameli’s sex till a little after she was born, so we have plenty unisex new born goodies. They really don’t need to be washed and put in the cupboard yet though, do they! There’s time yet, but I look forward to planning for you.
Well, Squidgy, thanks for not making me too sick so far. It’s been nice to just get on with business as usual.
Love you already, my little tadpole baby.